Sunday, December 19, 2010
Hi.....my name is Liz......and I
Yes, its true. Years ago when we lived in Dallas and I made the 30 mile drive to work each day in heavy traffic, I started witnessing a side of Liz I never knew existed. A scary scary side. I "looked" for opportunities to use my horn; my fist in the air; mouthing what an "idiot" the driver in front of me was..... In hindsite, I'm thinking it was a psychological need to be "heard" and the fist and "air mouthing" was most likely aimed at my then-boss, Peter.
Until one day.
I was doing the usual stuff above when a guy in the next car showed me his gun......wellllll folks, I've got to tell ya.......I changed my ways that day......
Instead of honking, yelling and fist shaking, I learned that whenever a landscape truck full of workers pulling a trailer of lawnmowers cut me off on the freeway, it worked much better to pull up next to them, roll my window down and point FRANTICALLY at their trailer all the while mouthing the words, "FIRE"!!! As they waved "thanks" to me, I would then zoom on ahead, watching in my rearview mirror as they aimlessly manuevered off the freeway to put out the imaginary "fire".......sometimes it was a good 20 miles before I stopped laughing........
This technique has worked hundreds of times and hasn't failed me yet......works every time.
I tell you this story cause I ticked off a guy the other day on my way into town. I was late to a meeting and I must have come up too quickly behind him which must have scared him.....I backed off and stayed behind him the entire way into town cause he was throwing his fist in the air and "air mouthing" words I'm guessing much worse than "idiot"........At one point he pulled the vehicle over, rolled down his window, ready for a confrontation........But here's where it gets interesting.....as I passed him, we made eye contact long enough to know that........we knew each other.
This guy is normally a real sweetheart.....never in a million years could I ever have imagined him this angry.....which, unfortunately, reminded me a lot of my previous-self which then reminded me of how far I've come with my horn-honking-fist-in-the-air anger issues.
Maybe I should share my anger management technique with him.......
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4 comments:
Ha ha !!! I loved this one. I would always wave my pinky finger at them or hold my thumb and pointer finger about an inch apart while waving it at them letting them know that I'm sure they only have a ' member ' about that long, and oh my goodness, if you ever want to make one of the male species angry, just make them think that you think they have a small wanker - oh my, they go ballistic for sure. I always do this with a smile on my face, which makes them even more annoyed to think I'm not angry, but think this is amusing ! Talk about male ego, but oh so funny !
Keep the great stories coming, love ya -
Denise
Been in dallas since college. I have had my share. Best is pissing them off waving and knowing that every time time they tell the story they get mad again and I'm laughing.
Barry Crow
Girl, u must change.. They don't show you the gun they use it. nonia mc
Hi Liz, thanks for the info. Here in Colorado there's a lot of drivers that don't use the "Signal lights" to make turns, they thing the turning lights are optional and that angers me, however I have to do the best I can...Merry Christmas to you and Chuck!!
l
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