Never Drive A Lawnmower Over Tank 2

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


You know,  living in the country at the lake is nothing at all like living in the city.  For those of you who, like me, have never lived in the country before, there is a lot to learn.  A lot!  The bugs are bigger out here; we have armadillos in our front yard; killing a big snake is a common occurrence; you have to learn to sleep without the sound of police helicopters hovering over your house; AND the biggest adjustment; comprehending how the sewer system works.

Did you know that the earth was not created with an already established underground sewer system in place?  My entire life I lived in the city and never once did I wonder about the sewer system.  I guess I just thought the sewer system was created on Day 3 with the first appearance of dry ground.  But surprise surprise.........it wasn't!

At the lake, we have something called a "septic system" in our yards.  I had never heard of a septic system prior to moving to the country, but I "intimately" know all about the septic system now.   Without going into too much detail, here's the lowdown on country crap:  You have 3 huge underground tanks in your front yard, two of them have large round green lids; the "crap" goes out of the house into Tank 1; it sloshes around in there for awhile, solids drop to the bottom, and the "crap" that isn't "crap" anymore heads on over to Tank 2.....where it sloshes around some more, gets chewed on by tiny little bacteria bugs and then heads on over to Tank 3 for a final rinse.  At this time, it gets mixed with bleach and then..........get ready...........dispels out  your sprinkler system.  Oh ya, you heard me right; OUT YOUR SPRINKLER SYSTEM (Note to City Friends:  Bad idea to let the kids play in the sprinkler system in the country!).

Why am I telling you this, you ask?  Because you need to know how dangerous these septic tanks are.  You need to know what can happen if you run over one of these septic green lids with the lawnmower.

Shortly after we moved to the lake, we purchased our first riding lawnmower.  I was driving along singing to myself on the mower when I came upon the row of septic tank lids.  I remember thinking, "I should probably lift the blade on the mower before going over these" when suddenly the mower stalled out.  Yep........the blade was stuck on the lid of Tank 2.  Really Stuck!   I've got to tell ya, my Charlie was none too happy about my trying to mow the septic lid!  As we tried pushing the mower off the lid, it suddenly gave way and, seeing as I was on the back of the mower when it gave way, I next found myself "falling" into the hole where Tank 2's lid used to be.  (I seriously just heard you go "eeeeeww"....didn't you??)

Actually, only half of me went in the hole.....one WHOLE leg.......and the pain; ohhhh.....such pain!  And there's my Charlie, my sweet sweet Charlie, looking back at me from the front of the mower trying to find the perfect words.....and all he comes up with, "Get out of there, Liz!"......

Now that the pain has subsided and the bruises are gone, I can sordof laugh about it.  AND, I'm relieved to know that some good did come out of this experience.  I no longer am allowed to mow the yard..........